Can I Answer That Question?

Sometimes when our interventionist is asking the troubled student questions in our office, I want to answer for them… “What could we do to make exercising not so boring?” …. how about a donut bar? Is that an option?

They Are Everywhere!

TEACHER: I think the rain is causing my headache..

ME: No.. it’s the children! Haven’t you noticed that we are infested with them?

False advertising

Got an email from the boss that says “Subs on Thursday” in the subject line. I got really excited thinking we were getting sandwiches…

OH no.. note again…

In a hospital, a musical chime is played over the intercom every time a baby is born. We should do something similar at school… like sound a siren every time a child barfs.

Children are painfully truthful

KID: Why is your hair that color…and THAT color?
ME: Well, I’m growing the color out, so the top part is my new color and the bottom part is my old color.
KID: The top is white because you’re old.
ME: …… ….. Yes.
(I prefer to think of it as being white because I’m no longer in denial… but even so, I’ll be arriving early tomorrow to break all his crayons)

Here’s how the conversation goes…

KID: My teacher asked me to bring you this (a laptop)
ME: OK, let me see it..
KID: Because somebody flipped the screen again..
ME: OK…. Let me take a look…
KID: Somebody keeps doin’ this and nobody knows…
ME: OK. You can stop talking now.

It makes you rethink this whole CRAZY idea we had about teaching them to talk in the first place…..

I knew it!

Rachel: Every time a sock goes missing it comes back as a tupperware lid.

I helped people today by listening

Not all problems need a solution, they just need to be heard.

Will the true story please come forward?

Parent brings in child super late to school… her reason? “Our breaker tripped.. and our alarm didn’t go off… and it was really cold….and we just didn’t want to get out of bed this morning.” If you wait long enough before you start writing out the tardy slip, the truth will eventually come out.

Um.. OK…..

It has been a while, but it’s time to award another Special Snowflake Award. I had a mom tell me that it was offensive for me to bring up attendance to her. (I’m the attendance clerk…)